Daddy's Little Narcotic

My 2 year old walked into the room, climbed up on my lap, laid her head on my chest and just started watching t.v. with me.

I asked her, "What's wrong baby?"
"I want to sit with you." She said.

#Wow

I can't really explain how that made me feel but I'd guess any parent is familiar with the feeling or at least I hope so. I know Love because I love my wife, my parents, siblings, etc. But this wasn't THAT. I want to say it was like eating an endless supply of your favorite food but even then you'd eventually get full and have to stop. There is no getting enough of THIS feeling.

While she watched television I watched her, smelled her hair, pinched her cheeks and kissed her head. She had to be wondering...

"What is up with Daddy?",

But she never complained. It was like she knew how tightly she was wrapping me around her little fingers just by sitting there and letting me soak it all in.

"I got him now" is what she was probably thinking. And between me and her (and now you), I'm cool with that. Even when we're in public and I deny it, we'll both know the truth.

Like I said, I know Love. I feel it everyday, I'm surrounded by it but THIS isn't THAT. It's something else. Every once and a while she'd look up at me and I'd look back and start thinking about my life before her, my life with her now and her life in the future without me, all at once. It's like I was Keanu Reeves getting plugged into the Matrix and all of these images and feelings start surging through my brain.

Then after about 20 minutes she hears her sister in the other room and climbs down and runs off...

"Okay, see you later crocodile!"

And she's gone.

But I'm okay, I don't make a fuss. I had my moment and now I can clear my mind, get back to killing brain cells in front of the boob tube in peace. I'll try to figure out what kind of narcotic she slipped into my water while I wasn't looking and search for an antidote before she's old enough to ask for the keys to the car.

And don't worry I'm not showing favorites. I have something for the other one too. But too much sentiment at once is bad for the "crazy daddy" image.

#keeppushing
#BeBetter