Chapter 8

One day I'll write a book about being a father and I'll call it: "Being Daddy: Yall Didn't Tell Me It Would Be Like This".

The book will focus on all the stuff people DON'T warn you about becoming a parent. Granted, becoming a mom or dad is probably different for everyone but there are a few things that we all have in common.

For example, Chapter 8: Yoga Is Your Friend.

As soon as my wife found out she was pregnant with our first daughter I should have signed up for Yoga classes. This would have given me ample time to prepare my body for the trauma it would experience for the next several years (and that's several years PER child).

Here's a sample of chapter 8 for your reading pleasure.


Yoga Will Come In Handy When...

1) You're a new dad and trying to feed your newborn for the first time. Nothing you've ever done has prepared you for the way your muscles will tense up from fear and anxiety as you try to hold this tiny living being with one hand and the warm bottle you just spent 20 minutes heating to the right temperature in the other. Not to mention the way your back will ache because you didn't get into the right position before you started feeding and now you're too scared to move.

2) You get caught slipping, laying flat on any surface; bed, floor, couch, etc. and leave yourself vulnerable to some energetic toddler who mistakes you for a trampoline. When it's time to play your kids don't want to hear about a slipped disc, cracked vertebrae, bruised sternum, or any of that foolishness. It's time to jump and you offered your body by NOT standing up when they walked in the room.

3) You're new to the car seat game. Bending over into the car trying to untangle straps and fasten this or that, can do "work" on your neck and back. Especially if you take too long. Finger dexterity comes in handy in this situation as well. You may need to combine Yoga with meditation in this instance if you have a child rushing you during the entire process. (See Chapter 3: Meditation, How To Escape Reality Even For Just A Moment).

4) Your favorite chair or favorite spot on the couch is now EVERYONE's favorite spot on the couch. What kind of dad says "beat it I was here first"? So you practice what you preach and you share your cozy little "spot"and you make space. But this requires flexible limbs and a limber spine to bend and twist in a way that allows everyone else to be comfortable and allows you to at least have somewhere to sit.

There are more examples but if I give it all away now you won't buy the book. NY Times Bestsellers list here we come!